Debt Consolidation Sanitation - Wipe the Floor with Your Debts

Clean Up Your Act With Debt Consolidation Sanitation!! Today!!

Wipe the floor with your debts - the Debt Consolidation Sanitation theme

Mop, mop, mop. All day long. Mop, mop, mop, while I sing this song.

Sweep, sweep, sweep, every day. Never gonna give my broom away.

Clean, clean clean, gotta clean up those debts.

That's what Debt Consolidation Sanitation does best.

In these crazy times, it seems like kids do everything earlier than they did back in my day. I don't even want to get into some of the crazy s--t I have seen go down in the locker rooms lately. But I'm not just talking about experimenting with obvious stuff, I am talking about debts too. These kids are already spending way more than their measly part-time jobs will ever pay, all because credit cards give them that freedom. Not unlike slamming a kid's face into a locker, I find this just plain wrong.

I'm Edward Stuck. Most of the kids just call me Ed. Or Mr. Stuck. Sometimes both.

I'm the custodian here at D.C. High School, and a few months ago I founded Debt Consolidation Sanitation to help educate kids about credit card debt and other potential financial problems they face. Below, I'll give you the lowdown on how my programs work.

Debt Consolidation Sanitation effortlessly sweeps away bad credit

These kids are good kids. You can tell. They are just so darned stupid that it's amazing some of the colleges they get into. You would not believe how little they know about misusing credit cards, and how much debt that can lead to. They wouldn't know an APR from a hole in their a$$. They don't comprehend that the "minimum payment" option is a damn screw job. I'm sick of it, and am here to tell 'em how to save 33 percent or more on their bills, and pay off debt 3-5 times faster than they could on their own. If you want to work with my Debt Consolidation Sanitation program, all you have to do is sign up.

The only thing I ask, in return for my expert advice, are the little things. Extra food from lunch. Tips on who the f--k keeps defiling the damn lockers with graffiti. I won't say who narked. Nor will I tell the mean cafeteria lady that you ganked me any food. Not to worry.

Step into the janitor's closet for Debt Consolidation Sanitation advice

So, youngan. You want to find out more? You got concerns you need resolved, questions you need answers to? I can help. But you gotta be discreet and strong for me, okay. This debt consolidation has got to stay under wraps, or we're all toast. If the school gets wind of the fact that I am running the Debt Consolidation Sanitation site from this closet next to the girls bathroom, they will fire me on the spot. And, more importantly, if you don't come in here with the right attitude, you are never gonna get nowhere. It's not enough to talk about fixing credit. Nor is it enough to simply want your problems to vanish. You have to MAKE them go away, kiddo.

Debt Consolidation Sanitation can help, but the responsibility lies with you. Remember that.

Now grab me some tater tots from the cafeteria. Those are my personal favorites.